At the risk of sounding old (school!) I think it’s fair to say that the standard of civility in communication has eroded dramatically over the past decade. We all learned the kindergarten concept, “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.”
The challenge is many have forgotten the concept. In leadership, respectful communication is crucial. The sixth component of The Nine Essentials of Significant Leadership is communicate respectfully. “The Colonel always said, “You don’t have to respect everyone, Lauren Ann. You have no right to disrespect anyone, young lady.”
Throughout the 20th century, and leaking into the 21st, the standard for effective communication was to be assertive, neither passive nor aggressive – assertive. Over the last 15 years, I have challenged myself to a higher standard, and therefore I have no choice but to challenge my audiences and clients to a higher standard, which is respectful communication.
You see, respectful communication, by its very nature, is assertive. I’ve discovered that not all assertive communication is necessarily respectful.
Therefore, to meet the challenge of communicating respectfully, significant leaders always keep a primary objective in mind when they are communicating. And that objective is: all people feel safe, physically, intellectually, emotionally safe, and treated with respect in our presence while we stand our own ground and get our message across.
Significant leaders do not compromise on that objective, and it has to come in that order. Now, this may seem a little backward based on conventional wisdom.
But my research and experience have proven that when these objectives are out of order, leadership falters, communication breaks down, and the whole organization becomes less effective. Essential number six of The Nine Essentials of Significant Leadership: communicate respectfully.
Read Lauren’s Whitepaper on The Nine Essentials of Significant Leadership.
